Lost and Found

So here I am, sitting in my apartment all by myself, trying to get the motivation to write my four page English paper that's due tomorrow, and I procrastinating-ly decide to check my email before starting it.

I am so glad that I did.

I got an email from David early this morning, out of nowhere. I haven't written him in ages, because I am a terrible friend. But he got a prompting to write me, and I am SO so grateful that he listens to those promptings.

I have really been struggling for a few months now, and I was kind of unaware that I was until recently. The past few weeks have made me realize how lost I am, and how in desperate need I am of someone to reach out and help me. I haven't been that shining example I once was, and even though I sometimes can't find the desire to do all the righteous things I know I am supposed to, David helped me remember that there are people counting on me to do the right thing.

Here's his letter.

"Kelsey!  I don't know why I'm writing you, but I've been thinking of you a lot the past few weeks, and feel like I should write and tell you hi.  I just want to thank you for being a very righteous friend to me--you were always so dedicated to keeping the commandments, from moral purity, to sabbath observance, to regular temple attendance.  I actually learned from you to wear my church clothes all day on Sunday as respect for the day of the Lord.  I really appreciate that.  I haven't heard much from back home recently, but want you to know that I love you and that I'm grateful to have you as my friend.

Life in the Philippines has many challenges.  One of them is that most of the pianos here are out of tune.  Every time I hear one, I think of you and laugh a little bit inside myself.  However, there is a beautiful lesson in this.  We, like pianos, need continual tuning--repentance--in order to keep our wills in line with the the will of the Lord.  Without such, any melody that the Lord wishes to play through us just won't come out quite right.  On the other hand, as we repent, that which we do ever day becomes more melodious and more beautiful.  We are filled with joy and peace, and don't have to feel that uncomfortable cringing that comes when things are "out of tune." I know that this is true and bear witness thereof in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

There.  That's my musical analogy for the day.  I thought you would appreciate it  I hope you like it and that you're well.  I love you as my friend, and know that you can always write me about anything.

Love,
Elder David S. Kartchner"

I forgot that I used to be the righteous example everyone looked up to. I don't even remember what that feels like anymore, but I know I need to get that back. I know that God is keenly aware of my needs, and He knows when I am crying out for someone to find me. From over 7,000 miles away, across the Pacific Ocean, David was able to be there for me when I needed it most.

He even made a music reference (: which actually helped me see what I need to do clearer than any other way would have. I have been "out of tune" lately, and I need to fix that.

I am so grateful for the Gospel, and that God hears and answers our pleas. I can't even say prayers, because I have been too much of a chicken to actually pray about it. But in my heart I was crying out, and He heard me. I am so grateful for friends who act on promptings. I am grateful for music in my life, and for being able to relate it to my life when nothing else works. I am grateful for trials to help us see the path we should be on. Even though breaking up after a five month relationship has been hard, I am starting to see that it was a good thing. I need to be back on the right path, and even though Coltin was a great guy, dating him was not the path I needed to be on.

I'm going to make it.

Everything will work out.

With God on my side, I CANNOT fail.

<3

And now back to writing that English paper...