I miss my brother.

And I miss my family.

This might sound weird, seeing as I live with them and see them all on a daily basis (usually). But as I was sitting in church today, with a cute family in front of me with their two daughters and a son, it hit me. I miss the four of us sitting together at church. And the four of us doing anything together, really. My brother often (at least 90% of the time, I'd say,) ditches out on family activities. I know we can't force him, but I miss it. I miss us. Is this what the Celestial Kingdom is gonna be like if he doesn't make it (assuming the rest of us do)? I don't know if I can bear that. It wouldn't feel the same without my brother. Not at all. I need to do everything in my power to get him back. I need him as part of the family again.

14 day walk with Christ, and I've made it a week! I'm half way there! I don't know if I've ever made it this far. Maybe when I first got it, but I really don't remember. Day 7: Integrity - I will have the moral courage to make my actions consistent with my knowledge of right and wrong.

Of course it is important to choose the right, but do we ever think about the reason we make decisions? Not only do we need to do what is right, but with the right attitude and for the right reasons as well. The reverse is also true. It doesn't matter what our intentions are if we are still making wrong decisions. We never know who is watching, and we need to always be setting a righteous example for others; even if no one is watching. Heavenly Father is watching over us and knows what we do, even when no one else is around. I've realized, I need to especially be on my guard up at Utah State. I don't want to attract the wrong people, even just as friends. I have a feeling it will be slightly similar to high school, wherein there are a majority of Latter-day Saints, but a decent number who are not. And of those who are, there will be some who haven't fully figured it out yet and are still struggling to choose the right. I need to be an example for them, and I can't let them drag me down.

The Swimsuit


Morning...yuck! Even though there were only a few more days of school left, it sure was hard getting there. The weather had been great all week and besides the only thing going on at school was graduation practice. It wasn't just me, either. All of my senior friends had a bad case of "Senioritis". We really were struggling those last few days. At school my friends devised a plan. "After lunch lets all go over to the outdoors pool and catch some sun," they chimed in. "We're not doing any thing in class anyway," they agreed. What they said made sense, and after all, we had already turned in our books in English anyway. When the bell rang for lunch we all went and jumped in my car. As I waited in the car while they each went in to get their suits, I wondered to myself, "Why am I doing this?" But then I concluded what could it hurt? School was almost out for the year anyway. We pulled up to my house and I quickly ran inside to get my suit. I reached into my drawer and pulled out my light lavender swim suit. "Lavender....Purple....Integrity," I said to myself. How could I slough school and go down to the pool wearing this swimsuit? All the things I had bee taught in young women's came back slamming me in the face. Right then I knew I couldn't do it. I turned to my friends who were waiting impatiently for me. "Listen you guys, I can't go swimming right now." I told my friends. "If you want to wait till after school I'd love to go, but right now I can't." My lavender swim suit reminded me of how I should act at all times, and in all things, and in all places. 

Even the smallest decisions matter. I know there have been times when I haven't been 100% honest about things, even when it comes to schoolwork, sadly to say. That is going to stop. I am deciding right now that I will always be 100% honest, especially when it comes to my education.

Side note: I always thought it was spelt "sluffing." Who knew?